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So I made homeless a criteria -I.e. no caretaker then I had two larger problems - Pain and Hyper-Aggression.Prior to the Night of Hell, I had headaches once or twice a year. Now, I continually suffer from some sort of migraine discomfort. By continually I literally mean 24/7/365. I have had approx 9 symptom free days since Aug .16,2017. Intensity level ranges from a teeny tiny amount of pressure to having the Texas Chainsaw Massacre done to my skull. I have very high pain tolerance. In my former job you had to. I’m talking pain levels high enough to make me lay in bed for several hours crying and using every bit of my self restraint to keep from putting my gun in my mouth to make it stop because my pain pills aren’t getting it.So there’s large bursts of OMG pain occasionally and an almost constant drone of low level that I live with always. You get sick of that. When you stop hurting. You’re afraid to move because it might start again.With my type of Aphasia you transition back and. This time though, I hold my leg against the chair, hoping he can't get a good hold with the grinder, but he's stronger than I am and pulls my leg right into the device as I scream and kick around with my right leg's stump.Then he gets up, and places a big bowl of chopped meat on my lap. For a brief moment, it doesn't even register. I don't want to know that this is me. But it is. He unstraps my right hand and grinds up each finger, passing the bones through a hole in the center, followed by the hand, all over the bowl as I watch in horror and scream. He bandages it and repeats for my left hand. Leaving my neck strapped in, he takes the bowl and walks out of the room, leaving the bones on the floor.I fight to try to unhook myself with my stumps, but it's no use. The straps are like belt buckles, and require fingers to open. A few minutes later, he comes back with a collar and leash. I try to bite his hand as he hooks the collar around my neck and unstraps me from the chair, but.
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